Sunday, April 15, 2012

Amazing Scientific Discovery

After months of intensive research, including observations and collation of data, I have made a monumental discovery.  My observations will undoubtedly alter the direction of science as we know it.  The conclusion I have made is actually rather obvious.  I am surprised that I did not come upon it sooner. 

My bathroom is a Time Dilation Field

It only works after a complicated combination of taps are turned on and off.  When you use the cold water in the basin first and then use the shower and go back to the basin, it activates a slowing down of time within a localised field.  You might think that I have gone totally nuts.  You might believe that I have officially lost my marbles.  However, I am certain that this is the only logical explanation for my observations. 

In the morning, after I have had breakfast, I glance at the clock to see that I have half an hour before I have to leave for work.  I pull out my clothes for the day and head to the bathroom for my morning "routine".  Before walking into the bathroom, I glance at the clock again and see that I still have 26 minutes before I have to leave for work/church/ an appointment.  I do not dilly-dally in the bathroom.  I clean my teeth, have a quick shower, wash my face and arrange my hair.  When I emerge from the bathroom I look at the clock and discover that I only have 2 minutes before I have to leave.  AAAAAHHHHH!!  This happens everyday.  Weekdays, weekends,  holidays, special events and quiet days at home are all held up, while I am in the bathroom. 

I am convinced. 
My bathroom is a Time Dilation Field and that's that. 


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