I am not really a "people person." I am very shy. I am uncomfortable in new situations and when I have to work with people I don't know. It takes me a long time to pick up on the rhythms of other people, their joking tone, their serious tone. People just down right scare me. It is even worse when I have to talk to them, I usually end up saying something the wrong way round. Sometimes a comment makes sense in my mind but when I say it out loud other people just look at me like I am a freak. For a long time, I avoided people in general, I stuck to a select group of friends and when thrown into new situations I would withdraw. Above all, I detested help. I hated relying on other people. I hated asking for help.
Unfortunately, I discovered how lonely it can be when you live inside the walls of your mind. When you try to do everything on your own, you usually fail. When you don't ask questions, you never learn, you don't find out why things happen or how things work.
Today is Thursday, which means... saying thank you!
In the last two years, I have learned how important it is to have other people around you. I have family, friends, colleagues and students. I have church leaders and mentors and confidantes. I am truly thankful for the "people" in my life. I still get nervous in new situations and around new people, but I don't withdraw like I used to. People are not all that scary after all. Most people have questions of their own, they are polite and don't really have any malice towards other people (especially complete strangers). Most people are willing to help out, to lend an ear, to have a laugh, to share a story. Most people like to tell you what they know.
I am thankful for the "people" in my life. I am thankful that in this big old bad world, I am not alone. Maybe there are a very small number of people who think the way I do, or at least understand how I think. There are very, very few people who accept that I think differently. I have to translate my thoughts into something that doesn't sound like jibberish! But they understand if I can't.
I am no longer an island! I am not deserted, isolated or solitary. I have people who love me! I have people who tolerate me! I have people who care for me! I have people who work with me! Life isn't perfect, but it is better because I have friends!
